Harriette Cole: My parents are coming to visit, and I’m panicking

DEAR HARRIETTE My parents are coming to visit me for Christmas in New York City and I really demanded to do something nice for them by booking an Airbnb or hotel so they could have their own space and be peaceful Related Articles Harriette Cole I keep falling asleep at the office How can I stay alert Harriette Cole My husband keeps talking about leaving LA but I can t go back to suburbia Harriette Cole We just located out my sister s irresponsibility could cost us our house Harriette Cole I dread going out of my apartment but I don t want to live anywhere else Harriette Cole I m in my s and that s too old to date a man who acts like this I tried to plan everything myself to make the visit special but I ended up waiting too long Now the prices are sky-high absolutely out of my budget and I m panicking I feel embarrassed because I had plenty of time to prepare and I don t want my parents to think I m irresponsible or that I don t care about making their trip enjoyable I m also stressed because my apartment is small and having them stay with me for several days is going to be cramped and uncomfortable for all of us I m torn between telling them the truth and trying to scramble for a last-minute deal that I can barely afford I just don t know how to handle this without disappointing them or putting myself in a financial hole How do I handle this situation gracefully and still make their holiday visit feel special Expensive Christmas DEAR EXPENSIVE CHRISTMAS This may be the the majority expensive time of the year for tourists in New York City Even if you had booked sooner prices would have been high because tourists flock to the city at this time Try to widen your search to cities in New Jersey that are an easy train ride to Manhattan You may find a better deal there Speak to your parents right away Explain that you have yet to find an affordable place for them to stay Don t give up the search but tell them you don t think you will be able to cover all the costs Work it out together so that you can salvage their trip DEAR HARRIETTE It is time to divide up my father s belongings among the family He passed away a inadequate months ago and we have to get rid of his stuff I have one sibling who is in charge of organizing everything and I feel like he is taking over My dad did not leave a will so we are just taking what we want but I can t help but feel like my sibling has picked over everything already and left the rest of us with the dregs I don t mean to feel like this but I don t think this is being handled equitably How can I address this without causing a family fight No Will Related Articles Miss Manners I lied about why I wasn t drinking and that just dug the hole deeper Dear Abby My husband and his buddy located the ex-girlfriend s message hilarious I did not Asking Eric It took him a year to ask why I wasn t coming around anymore Harriette Cole I keep falling asleep at the office How can I stay alert Miss Manners Can I tell them I plan to get rid of their gift or is thank you sufficient DEAR NO WILL Speak to your brother Let him know how sensitive this is for you and the rest of the family Your father s death was a blow and going through his things is emotional Thank him for taking the lead on handling your father s estate That is not an easy job Tell him that while you are grateful you are also concerned that he is making choices about things that he wants before the rest of the family can even see the items Ask him to have everything on view so that the whole family can see it all He can point out what he would like to keep but ask him to give the rest of you a chance to know what s there Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO